3 Signs Your DuPage County Divorce is Finally Over

Posted by Erin Birt | Sep 23, 2019 | 0 Comments

You might feel like your DuPage County Divorce will never end.  You seem to have endless paperwork to complete, telephone conferences with your Divorce Lawyer, and emotional conversations with friends and family.  You miss days at work and/or have to schedule a babysitter more often than you would like or can afford. You often wonder when your divorce will be done. Did you know that the most frequently asked question about the divorce process is: When will my divorce be over? Therefore, in this blog, we will summarize 3 signs that your DuPage County Divorce is finally over.

Sign #1: You received your final divorce court orders

After many weeks or months of discussing your case with your Divorce Attorney, completing and signing paperwork, and/or negotiating with your spouse and/or their attorney, you want to know when your divorce will be over.  One big sign that your divorce is over is when you receive your final divorce court orders which include a Judgment for Dissolution of Marriage.  The Judgement for Dissolution of Marriage is a large document, approximately 25 pages, which contains the financial allocation of your assets, debts, and liabilities. It includes provisions relating to Maintenance and Child Support as well. You receive a Judgment either after a settlement is agreed upon, the least expensive route, or after a trial, the most expensive route. 

The Judgment is an important document to keep with your important papers.  You will likely receive an electronic version of your Judgment that you can save to your computer, email to anyone that needs a copy, or print countless hard copies.  In counties that do not yet have an e-file system, you may receive a "stamped" or "sealed" hard copy of your Judgment.  Should you lose that hard copy, visit your Circuit Court Clerk's office for additional copies.  There will be a fee for ordering more copies. Also to note, you should request that your attorney obtain a "certified copy" of your Judgement.  A certified copy is a copy that will be verified as a true and accurate copy of the original signed Judgment.  For example, you will likely want a certified copy to close bank accounts, refinance a mortgage, or rent an apartment post divorce.

Qualified Domestic Relations Order

If you have a 401(k) or pension that was divided pursuant to a QDRO, which is a Qualified Domestic Relations Order, your DuPage County Divorce is truly finally over when the QDRO is approved, entered by the Court, and a copy is delivered to both you and the institution that manages the 401(k) and/or pension. Often during a divorce, people do not realize this extra step needs to be accomplished.

Sign #2: You stopped caring about your ex

At some point after you receive your certified copy of the Judgment for Dissolution of Marriage and your QDRO, you will notice that most of your efforts and emotions can be invested elsewhere.  You no longer have an urge to follow up on your ex-spouse or be concerned where your spouse is spending their time.  Your new interests will trump your desire to check up on your ex-spouse on Facebook and you will be less likely to waste your time doing a drive-by at their residence or work.  You will soon stop trying to find out information about your ex-spouse through your children or mutual friends.

Sign #3: You don't compare new relationships to your ex

While you are satisfied that you have your Judgment, you no longer have to work with your Divorce Attorney, and you have new hobbies and interests, you might actually start developing feelings for other people again.  During your divorce, you might have told your Divorce Attorney you never want to marry again, however, you might very well want to date after you and/or your children have had time to adjust.  You will realize that your DuPage County Divorce is finally over when your emotions toward yourself and others are more often positive than negative.  You will heal and you will start new relationships without comparing the new relationship to the relationship you experienced with your ex.

Once you receive your Judgement for Dissolution of Marriage, stop caring about your ex's information or whereabouts, and you cease comparing your new relationships to your ex, your DuPage County Divorce will finally be over both financially and emotionally.  It will take time, but you will heal and you will move on.  At Birt Law, we offer several divorce options to help you quickly and successfully start a new positive chapter in your life such as mediation, collaborative divorce, and uncontested divorce packages. Contact Us today to learn more.

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About the Author

Erin Birt

Since 2003, Erin N. Birt, J.D., CADC has focused her practice on parenting time, divorce, mediation, and substance abuse issues. Ms. Birt's unique background in both family law and addictions counseling help her clients successfully navigate the complex issues of coparenting and divorce. Ms. Birt also devotes her time to presenting at continuing education seminars for attorneys, mediators, and counselors.


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